The Problem With Being the Strong One

If you are good in a crisis, people may begin assuming you do not have them.

You make the call. Find the paperwork. Drive everyone home. Remember the appointment. Keep your voice level while the room is falling apart.

Then someone tells you how strong you are, and you wonder why the compliment feels a little lonely.

Strength is useful. But if you perform it continuously, people may stop seeing the cost.

Do not wait until collapse to provide evidence that you also need care.

Ask earlier. Be specific. Let someone bring dinner before you are too exhausted to eat it. Say that you are frightened without immediately explaining why everything will probably be fine.

Vulnerability does not cancel competence.

It gives the people who love you a chance to participate in your life as something other than spectators admiring how well you carry it.